Why You Need to Love Yourself Before Loving Others - SanTanValley.com

Why You Need to Love Yourself Before Loving Others

Why You Need to Love Yourself Before Loving Others

A satisfying relationship with a special someone doesn't happen overnight. If you're looking for love, you may wonder why it's just not happening. You may find the process much easier if you learn to love yourself first, experts say. "If you don't put yourself first, then you are denying your abilities to the world around you," says Carolyn Bates,...

A satisfying relationship with a special someone doesn't happen overnight. If you're looking for love, you may wonder why it's just not happening. You may find the process much easier if you learn to love yourself first, experts say.

"If you don't put yourself first, then you are denying your abilities to the world around you," says Carolyn Bates, a certified personal life coach, or ICF. "Putting yourself first will support your self-esteem."

Learning to love yourself is a bit like going through therapy, Bates says. If you don't know yourself--who you are and what you want--it can be difficult for you to make solid, sustainable decisions about another person with whom you want to be close.

Learning to put yourself and your needs first can be especially difficult for women, says Susan Shapiro Barash, author of Toxic Friends and You're Grounded...But First Let's Go Shopping. "There is so much pressure on women in our culture, and you're pegged as a type early on," she says. "It can be hard to really feel good about yourself."

If you're not sure how to actually go about loving yourself, keep in mind:

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